Conquering my fears

For some reason I have a fear of ladders. Roy has no fear of ladders, he climbs them like a champ, even to the roof. I am not sure, maybe I think they are unstable. Well with building a house you can't get by from going up and down a ladder, just can't. So I think I have done pretty well with this one.

Another thing that I get scared of are stairs. Not just regular stairs, but ones that don't have the backs on them and you can see the light coming through them. We have had our steps going downstairs like that for a little while now, so I have gotten pretty good at going faster and not worrying about them. I remember one day working at the house and I was walking down the steps. Aj's mom asked me if I felt okay. I think she asked that because of the look on my face walking up and down these stairs and I was walking really slow.

So then today happened. We had another snow day and I felt pretty good about going and being productive and finishing up all my paint touch ups in the house. Well when I got there I remembered what state our stairs were in. We started yesterday taking the steps off so we could drywall the sides of the walls going downstairs. How could I possible walk down these stairs with steps missing!? You had to stand on the wood pieces that normally hold up the steps. I quickly texted AJ, twice, explaining my panic. Then I called him and asked if he read my messages. Of course he did. He said well if you can't do it then leave. The paint was in the basement so I had to go down. He was no help, I don't know what help I was looking for.. Of course he went up and down these step things yesterday with no problem and was holding drywall.
3 or 4 times I sat at the top just putting my feet on the wood holders and got up cause I just panicked. Then I decided to go open a Mt. Dew and get it together. I went back and put my feet again on the wood, held on the side for dear life and prayed. Then I stood up and walked down very carefully. I did it. I was so proud of myself. I quickly texted Aj saying I did it. He wrote back, "good."

Thank goodness for carpet coming Monday...